The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome
by triviatrap1982
Summary: Ranma's in a rut. His old man, Genma, has informed him that he's engaged to some more women! That's making his life a living nightmare. Though, somehow...Nabiki comes up with a very clevery plan. How will this all turn out, read and review.
1. The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome

by

triviatrap 1982

(I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, Ranma 1/2, or Inuyasha...just own my thoughts and my originial characters)

The first day of school, it's normally a universally happy time for some kids...unfortunately, it was a rough time for others. Take Ranma Saotome, age 16. He went to Jusenkyo with his irresponsible father and got drowned in the spring of drowned girl. Add in the fact that he has fiancees that are constantly trying to get with him then you have a recipie for disaster. Though, quite a few kids moved away, new students came in. The first group were somthing that Ranma could get along with.

'Man I wish I had a girl who would actually _listen _to me,' Ranma thought to himself.

"Ranma...you're not thinking about those floozies are you?" a pissed off Akane pressed.

"None of your business!" Ranma said. "Besides, why would _I _think about an uncute tomboy like _you?" _

"JERK!" Akane snapped as she nearly took his head off. That is...she _hated _when she was called an uncute tomboy by Ranma. She also has a beef with him for seeing _her _in the nude (even though she walked in on him). Though, three boys walked in, and two of whom were very pissed off.

"SHUT IT, DRAGON BREATH!", the first boy spat to a brown haired...cerlean blue-eyed terror.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT YOU DOG?", the said boy spat at the blonde haired, and very pissed off second.

"Listen you two, this isn't Domino!", a third, red and blonde porcupine head snapped, and the two quited down.

"So...you must me the new students here," Ranma said.

"Yep! Let us introduce ourselves, I'm Yugi Moto," the porcupine-head said.

"I'm Joey Wheeler...and the Jerk, is Seto Kaiba."

"Just shut up!" Kaiba Snapped.

"I'm Ranma Saotome," he said shaking all of their hands.

"Damn, you practice martial arts?" Joey asked.

"Yep, Anything Goes Martial Arts," Ranma answered

Seto Kaiba tried to take a shot at Ranma who blocked it easily. "To slow!" Ranma said.

Then, the three took their seats...however, there were three new students who came in...two beautiful, black-haired girls,...and a boy who looked like he was a pervert. Though, he had a very red hand mark on his face which told the entire story.

"Miroku, you pervert!" Sango and Kagome snapped.

"Well, it's not my fault I like pretty women," Miroku answered.

"Feh! GO SIT DOWN!" Kagome ordered, as he went.

Then after all that was over, a new teacher came in, and her name was Ishizu Ishtar. She's of Egyptian decent, and she was tall, dark, and pretty. She came in wearing a conservative dress, and she let her long hair flow down. She, then took her seat behind the desk, and the perverts croweded to the front of the room...nearly all of the boys, and half of the girls.

"Well, now, I see you're ready to learn," Ishizu said. "let's learn shall we?"

'I _hope _Mr. Tendo didn't do anything stupid,' Ranma thought to himself.

'I hope that Genma didn't do anything stupid,' Akane thought to herself.

"Ok, where were you at with your lesson?" Ishizu asked.

The perverts in the front ended up plowing though their homework to go to the point to where Ishizu would teach therm. After class, and when lunchtime came, Ranma went to go and get himself some octopus puffs (his favorite snack). After school, however, after Ishizu graded her papers for the day, she went to the gym to go and work out. That is, she and a bunch of other teachers got together to play basketball. After however, she was in the locker room changing...a creepy, perverted, nasty, stinky old goat.

"Ah! Egyptian silk, pretty!" The said demon of perversion said with a sigh.

"GET OFF ME YOU MONSTER!" Ishizu barked as she KO'd the pervert out of the women's locker room.

"Hey, now, a feisty one," he said as he popped her bra and ran off with it...and all of Ishizu's spares. However, this didn't go unnoticed all of the girls who came in with her were ready to beat him down...including one Tendo by the name of Akane.

"Happosai..." Akane said with the look of murder in her eyes. "...you will die for messing with my teacher."

"Well, well, if it isn't Akane..." Happosai stopped and realized one of the two lifted bras was missing. "Can we talk?"

"No," Akane said as Ishizu got dressed, this time, ready to kill him.

"I think I left the water running at home!" he said quickly and he bolted...though everybody, including Ishizu was chasing after him.

Meanwhile, Yugi, Joey, and Ranma were outside talking about his misfortunes...though Kabia just sat and listened. Ranma went on how his father dragged him to China, and took them to Jusenkyo, and well...the rest his history. Though, Yugi and Joey understood...because wierd things had happened to them...and with that millineum puzzle around his neck...even wierder.

"That sucks!" Joey said. "If you need somebody to fuck your father up, then I can _easily _have it arranged."

"Enough," Kaiba said. "It's all a trick."

"You know, Kaiba, you _can _start saying things other than that," both Yugi, and Joey said.

"Hey, step behind that tree," Ranma said, as he instinctively knew what was going to happen.

"Yugi, face your fears like a man!" Kaiba snapped.

"Yeah, then _why _are you hiding with me?" Yugi asked.

"Hm...good question."

"Well, your friend Joey, has a lot of balls," Ranma said.

"Shit for brains, but he has balls," Kaiba said.

"Normally, I'd defend him...but this time, Kaiba, you're right," Yugi said.

Then, Happosai, and the crew of angry women came though, happosai thought he could get Joey into trouble...but unfortunately, he jumped out of the way so that he couldnt' toss his bra on him...or so he thought. As soon as he came down, he saw Ishizu's bra in his back pocket. Then, he was sourrounded by a mob of angery women...except for Ishizu, who knew better.

"So, you're a pervert!" Akane accused.

"Calm yourself," Ishizu ordered.

"Why should I?" Akane asked.

"Because Happosai did the same thing he does to me...he sliped the panties in his back pocket so that Joey'd take the wrath," Ranma answered.

"WHO ASKED YOU, RANMA!" Akane snapped.

"I SAID CALM DOWN!" Ishizu barked and Akane instantly backed off.

"Miss Ishtar, did that sinky old goat get to you?" Ranma asked.

"The one you seek, has vanished," Ishizu said. "Now everbody, as you were."

Most of the girls dispersed, and Joey got his life saved by Ishizu. He was happy as Yugi and Kabia came out in stared at him like he just did something so very wrong. However, Joey was happy that he didn't get any broken bones, he couldn't duel under those circumstances. Later on, as they all went home, Kaiba followed Akane and Ranma..and well, this exchange suprised him...and to make matters worse, three other girls came out of nowhere. To add insult to injury, his rivals also came from nowhere.

"Ranma! PREPARE TO DIE!" a kid with a bandana said, as he was charging at him with a bamboo umbrella.

"RANMA YOUR LIFE ENDS HERE!" a black-haired boy said as he charged with a wooden Kendo sword.

"RANMA STAY AWAY FROM SHAMPOO!" another black-haired boy yelled, though he was looking at Akane.

"So...this is what he has to go through everyday huh?" Kaiba asked himself as he stayed back...then, Joey saw the entire thing and decided that he _needed _a good fight.

"Yo! Your beef with Ranma is also a beef with me," Joey said as he cracked his knuckles.

"What you!" the enemy combatants cried.

"What's the matter, Kuno, Mousse, and Ryoga, afraid you'll lose?" Ranma teased.

"Ranma, Joey, quit!" Akane said...but failed.

"THEN PREPARE TO DIE!" The three idiots said as they charged them.

"He got no chance," Kaiba said of Joey's situation.

When it was all said and done, the three idiots were beaten up very badly. That is, Joey and Ranma didn't even give them a chance to make their first move. Something that definately impressed, Kaiba, Ranma, and Akane. Once Ranma and Joey were done...The finacee brigade showed up and tried to make things a bit worse.

"Ranma go on date with, Shampoo?", the purple-haired amazon asked.

"Ranma-honey, come on you got to choose your fiancee!" Ukyo said.

'Damn, that's a big spatula!' Joey thought as he backed out of the way...quickly.

'Damn, that Ranma's in it...deep,' Kaiba thought as he stayed a safe distance.

"Ranma, darling, I haven't fufilled my womanly duties to you," Kodachi said as they edged closer..but Shampoo always got the hug off of him.

"RANMA YOU JERK!" Akane snapped as she blasted him clear into the stratusphere.

'Damn, I'm _glad _I'm not him, Akane's to viloent for me!' both Joey and Kaiba thought as they scattered.

Well, they both headed over to the Tendo house, where Ranma landed in the koi pond...and turned into Ranma-chan. Either way, this was one unhappy pig-tailed martial artist.

"Damn, Akane!" Ranma-chan snapped. "That un-cute tomboy has nothing better to do than to get on my nerves!"

"RANMA YOU CAN'T CHOOSE YOUR..." Genma started to say...but got cut off by an elbow to his gut.

"Hello!" Kaiba said.

"Ah, Seto, Joey, so nice to see you here." Ranma said as she got out of those wet clothes.

"You're...not.." Kaiba started.

"She is," Joey said. "Had you paid attention, _hot _water turns _her _back to him."

"You believe that?" Kaiba asked.

"Who wouldn't?" Came the tone of the middle tendo daughter, as she doused Ranma-chan with hot water.

"DAMN IT'S NO TRICK!" Kaiba said excitedly as he saw a _little _bit more of boy-type Ranma than he needed to see.

"I'll be down...I'm going to take a bath," Ranma said as he went to the bath, which was on the first floor.

Then, later on after everything was set, Genma decided that he needed witnesses to tell Ranma, he had _more _suitors. This was going to wear on Ranma's nerves really quickly. Though, when Ranma was finished with his bath...he knew that Genma was up to something...and well, it _never _went Ranma's way. Then, the two girls that just came to Furinkan came by. Sango and Kagome looked at Ranma...who looked at Genma..._and then _three other girls that Kaiba and Joey knew were there.

"What's going on, pops?" Ranma asked.

"Kaiba...I hope that old man got life insurance," Joey whispered to his friend.

"Why do you say that?" Kaiba asked.

"Because, Ranma's about to kill him, that's why," Joey answered.

"Ranma, my boy," Genma started, as Akane, Ukyo, Shampoo, Kodachi, Kuno, Mousse, and Ryoga came in. "I have some news for you."

"It had better be good," Ranma said cracking his knuckles. "If it ain't, say your prayers old man."

"It's good, boy!" Genma snapped. "You see these five girls here?"

"Yeah, what about them?"

"They're your newest fiancees!" Genma announced.

"WHAT, THE FUCK!" the entire room shouted...well except for Kasumi, Nabiki, and Soun.

"Well, Ranma...for 5,000 yen, I can help rid you of your problem," Nabiki said.

"Oh my," Kasumi just said softly.

"SAOTOME! HOW COULD YOU!" Soun snapped, then started crying...he did this regularly.

"Ranma..." Akane said, as she out of nowhere took out a mallet, "...prepare to die."

"Now wait a minute!" Ranma snapped. "I _did not _ask for no fiancee and I sure as shootin' never will!"

"YOU JERK!" Akane yelled as she aimed for the poor, pig-tailed martial artist.

"So, Ranma," Joey started, "so should me and Kaiba help you...or shall we let you do the dirty work."

"Joey...thanks for the offer, but the old man is my job," Ranma said.

"Well, teach the old fool a lesson...and yes Ranma...you're going to have a few more rivals," Kaiba said.

After that, Ranma beat the shit out of Genma again...though Happosai showed up and groped on Sango's ass. Miroku wasn't there, so there was one other explaination. That is, the old lecher had to die.

"Ah, such a nice firm bottom!" Happosai said as he continued to grope.

"Oh, I'm glad you feel that way old man," Sango said with a smile on her face. "Because, that'll be the last thing you feel on God's green earth if you don't get off, now!"

"I DON'T WANT TO! I DON'T WANT TO!" Happosai whined as he didn't want to let go.

"NO BODY CARES WHAT YOU WANT YOU OLD PERVERT!" Kagome snapped as she punched him dead in his face.

_"Now you've done it!" _Happosai said. He got the trademark anime glint in his eye, and that meant something was going to go down. Happosai wasn't your everyday pervert...he's addicted to women's undergarments and feeling them up whenever he could. Though, today, nobody was in the mood. Then a green-haired boy came, and he was very pissed.

"Which one of you is Happosai!" He demanded.

"There the pigtailed one!" Happosai said out of desparation...and the boy believed him.

"YOU MOLESTED MY OLDER SISTER YOU LETCH!" he snapped.

"Marik...is that you?" Joey asked.

"Yeah, why you ask?" Marik answered back.

"Because, _that _pig-tailed one is Ranma Saotome...that old fool down there, is the pervert."

"Thanks, Joey, I nearly had a lapse of Judgement."

"No problem, man!" Joey said.

Then, Marik let his dark side out...and it _never _was pretty.

"IF YOU WANT TO LIVE YOU WILL STAY AWAY FROM MY FAMILY!"

Then, Happosai made himself look very fucking big...though, Marik knew what to do, he did the same thing. Happosai accepted defeat and he went about his business. He went on his panty raids so that he could at least do something...perverted. Back at the problem at hand...What the hell was Ranma going to do, how was he going to deal with all of these fiancees? Well, Ranma has to get himself out of this situation and fast. Though, the three new girls took a liking to Ranma very quickly...all of whom Joey recognized.

"Serenity? Tea? Mai?" Joey asked in suprise.

"Yeah, Joey?" Tea answered.

"You're so fucked, all five of you,

"Oh, boy...explain yourself," Mai said as she bruhed back some blonde hair.

"See that man in those glasses..." Joey pointed to one dead Genma.

"Oh, that, you see Genma made a promise to...damn," Mai said as she relaized what Joey meant.

"Great, if he chooses Serenity, you'll be Ranma's brother-in-law." Tea said.

"Damn," Serenity said. "I have a feeling that we aren't the only ones who he's going to run away from."

"I see," Mai said as she noted Shampoo and Ukyo were about to have a bitch fight, as shampoo started to whip out her mases.

"Calm down now," Nabiki said. "I'm sure that for a nominal fee, I'll help figure all this out."

"Well, it's worth 10,000 yen" Ranma said as he went to get his money...and everybody else ponied up.

"Great," Nabiki said. "how about this, lucky Ranma here gets to date each of you individually, and after he gets to choose,"

"Sounds fair," Ranma said.

"However, Akane, you _may not _date with him first, or crash his other dates or you'll forfeit your shot."

"Sounds good to me, who'd date that pervert," Akane said.

"For everybody else, I'll put your names in a hat, and I'll draw it."

Nabiki did just that. With Akane, automatically placed as Ranma's last date, the drawing started. After a few minutes the results were very interesting. It happened as followed:

1. Tea

2. Ukyo

3. Sango

4. Kodachi

5. Serenity.

6. Kagome

7. Shampoo

8. Mai

9. Akane (who would had been last anyway)

"Now this is the order that has come up," Nabiki said. "I'll fine everybody in this room 1,000 yen if they interfere with a date."

"Double dates are legal right?" Joey asked.

"Yes, but you _still _must not interfere, or you'll be paying big time," Nabiki said.

"Then start paying up now, Kuno and Ryoga," Kaiba said.

"Why should..." Kuno started but was cut off by Ryoga and his bamboo umbrella.

"It's for the best," Ryoga said.

"Fine," Kuno said and quieted down.

"Ranma...get some rest, Friday is your first day with Tea," Nabiki ordered. "For the rest of you, be patient, you have a lot riding on this.

Now it was set, Ranma Saotome was forced to go on a date with each of the fiancees rather he wanted too or not. Though the good news is that, now he can keep all the other joker's away from him. Unfortunately nobody told Mousse the news and he was going to make an ass of himself. Well, these are the many loves and rivals of Ranma Saotome.


	2. Tea

The Many Loves of and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: The Date with Tea.

by

triviatrap1982

(I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, Ranma 1/2, or Inuyasha...damn I wish I did though)

Well, the nine dates are set, and Ranma was in a real pickle of a situation. He had nine Fiancees, thanks to Genma. However, he was able to see which were nice and actually listened. He also had the misfortune of being with the ones who didn't listen. Well, Akane would be the prime example, but he wouldn't date her for nine more weeks. It was further stipulated to make sure that Ranma had some recovery time, there'd be a one week interval between dates. However, Ranma turning into a girl was impossible to control, so they (who know about it already) let it go. When Friday came, however, Yugi quickly went from a friend to a rival in an instant, when he heard the girl he had a crush on, was engaged to Ranma.

"SON OF A BITCH!" Yugi snapped as Kaiba was trying to hold him back.

"It was his father's fault!" Kaiba said trying to reason with him.

Yugi switched to his alter-ego Yami, and then he was infuriated.

"Holy shit," Joey said. "Even though my sister's engaged to him as well, I won't hold that kind of a grudge."

"ENOUGH!" Yami snapped. "Tell me, where are they going for their date?"

"WHAT AND RISK PAYING NABKI TENDO 1,000 YEN! FORGET IT," Kaiba and Joey cried out.

"For as long as his hair's blonde, and my eyes are blue, you're not going to fuck this up for Ranma," Kaiba said.

"Yeah, what happened to being his friend?" Joey snapped.

"Well, that changed...quickly," the enraged pharoh said.

"Kaiba, help me tie him down, you know how he gets when he's pissed.

"Actually, Joey, why don't we see if we can set him up with Nabki," Kaiba suggested.

"Smooth move, ex-lax! Piss him off even more, and lead him and his grandpa in the poor house!"

"Shit, forgot, she can blackmail a Blue-eyes white dragon without problems!"

"I DON'T FUCKIN' CARE!" Yami snapped as he threw Kaiba into Joey knocking them out.

Well, While this was going on, Ranma was getting ready for his date with Tea. He dreaded what was going to happen. Akane was very vocal about her displeasure that he gets to date _everybody _before her. However, eight weeks was enough to plan for the perfect kick-ass date. Later, Ranma came to the front gates of the Tendo Dojo...which looked like they needed to be worked on. To his suprise, Tea showed up, on cue. She was wearing a short black skirt, and a white spegetti strap shirt. She also had on some white tennis shoes as well, and they were clean.

"Hello, Ranma," Tea greeted.

"Hello, Tea," Ranma greeted.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Yeah," He answered. Though, Ranma wore his usual Chinese fightng outfits. They were helpful, especially when he got turned into a girl. They decided to go to a small coffee house that Tea discorvered. When they got there, the atmosphere was small, and intimate. The servers weren't pusy, and the conversation was kept very low. Though, this rattled Ranma for a bit.

"Hey, I ain't been to a place like this," Ranma said softly.

:"Don't worry, you'll fit in perfectly here," Tea said.

"Hey, I see an empty table," Ranma pointed.

"Great, let's go take a seat," Tea said as she lead Ranma to his seat.

"This is very nice," Ranma said as he helped Tea sit down.

"Glad you feel that way," Tea said.

They both sat down at the table, though they didn't know that Yami was there. He'd enlisted the help of Kaiba's younger brother, Mokuba, to go and spy on them...which was cut short, when Kaiba caught him in the window.

"Gotta go!" Mokuba said as he bolted with the 10,000 yen.

"Waste of money," Yami said to himself...but he stayed back and saw the date.

Meanwhile, with Ranma and Tea, Ranma was explaning what had happened to him in Jusenkyo...though he did admit there were some good qualities.

"Well, at least I can get an extra octopus puff for free in the girl form," Ranma admitted.

"Octopus puffs! I love those!" Tea exclaimed. "You have an interesting way of doing things though."

"Yep, though, at least you don't have a crazy Amazon girl who always get you in trouble," Ranma said.

"I know, Akane told me that you and her ended up in the tub..naked togeter," She answered.

"So he _is _a pervert," both Yami and Yugi said together in their mind link. "Well, It's time to teach him some manners!"

After the quiet experience in the coffee shop, Ranma then decided to go to two of the restraunts that would let him come in, they went to Ukyo's place. Though she's not allowed to break the date, she is allowed to serve them food and talk to them. Plus her Japanese Pizza was the best in this part of Japan. Though, Yugi never got the memo about interfering with the date. Meanwhile, Joey went to go tell Nabiki everything.

"He what!" Nabiki said in her usual smart-ass tone.

"Yeah, he took me and Kaiba out!" Joey explained.

"...and you tried to stop him huh?", she asked.

"Yeah, but when he gets pissed...let's just say that I hope Ranma's carrying life insurance." Joey said.

"Do you know where he's at now?"

"Not a clue!" Joey said.

"Well, for his sake and yours, you better hope he doesn't do anything stupid."

"I'm going to look for him!" Joey said and he was on his way.

At Ukyo's...things were going pretty well...except that Ranma couldn't help but feel a bit creeped out, and a bit worried. Tea noticed this and decided to get to the bottom of it very quickly.

"What's wrong, Ranma?" Tea asked.

"Yeah, Normally you'd eat 3 of these things in one sitting, something's up," Ukyo said.

"Who's the porcupine head?" Ranma asked.

"Oh, that's just Yugi," Tea answered."You see that puzzle around his neck?"

"Yeah, I do," Ranma said. "This wouldn't happenen to have anything to do with our date does it Tea?"

"For his sake, I hope not!" Ukyo said as she got her giant spatula out.

"HOLD ON THERE!" Yami finally snapped. "YOU HAD _NO _RIGHT TO TAKE TEA FROM ME!"

"NOW WAIT A MINUTE!" Ranma yelled, knowing where this was going. "IT WAS MY POP'S IDEA TO ENGAGE ME TO HER WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE!"

"ENOUGH OF THE LIES!" Yami bellowed as he was ready to jump over the griddle and make Ranma sorry he even met him.

"Tea...you go outside and wait...I don't want you to get hurt."

"Right," Tea said as she did as she was told, and she saw Mokuba.

"Mokuba what are you doing here?" She asked.

"Tell Yugi to hightail it out of here! That Nabiki Tendo knows everything!"

"Shit, not what I wanted on my first date...excuse me," she said as she went in to set Yami straight...physically.

SMACK!

"Hey! What'd you do that for?" Yami asked...which was the common question around these parts anyway.

"YOU KNOW BETTER," Tea scolded him.

"You should know better than to treat people who want to be your friend!"

"Tea..not now, with yor incessant friendship speeches!" Yami whined.

"Tough! You're getting one anyway!"

Tea, then started to drone on and on about why he shouldn't mistreat others, though Ranma got the same speech for Kuno, and Ryoga's sake. After about an hour, Ranma just took his dinner to go. As soon as he got hime, he saw Nabiki standing there. She wanted to know all the juicy details, and where Tea was at.

"Where's Tea," Nabiki asked.

"I see why people don't like her," Ranma said.

"Why do you say that?" She pressed.

"Those damned friendship speeches," Ranma said. "It's like I hate Ryoga, or nothing."

"Oh, yeah, well, I should warn you that you're going to find out the other girl's most annoying quirks...even Akane's." Nabki warned.

"I think I had a sample of that."

"That's your dinner?" Nabiki asked.

"Yep"

"OK, I won't keep you then." Nabiki said.

"Want some?" Ranma offered.

"No thanks, I gotta watch my girlish figure," Nabiki said.

"See you in the morning," Ranma said.

"Oh, Ranma, why don't you sleep with me on the floor tonight, I don't want you father messing this up."

"Don't worry," Ranma said, "he messes up all the time."

"Alright," Nabiki said as she went to the dojo to check up on Akane...who was breaking dummies that looked like Ranma.

Ranma's first date didn't go as planned. He did realize he had to make a choice. Though, his mind was wondering about Nabiki. Nah, it'd never work between them. Though, Ranma had eight more dates to go. However, Tristan and Duke heard about Ranma's situation and they were happy about it.

"YES! THANK YOU GOD!" Tristan said. "THAT MAI KEEPS GETTING ON MY NERVES ABOUT THOSE HARPIE LADIES!"

"You ain't the only one happy!" Duke said.

"Hey, I wonder If I can get with that, Nabiki?" Tristan wandered.

"It's going to cost you...you'll have to get a part-time job!"

"Well, it'll be worth it...though her sister Kasumi though..." Tristan started and he had a fantasy with him and her in the bed.

"Damn, I see what you mean, a businesswoman and a housewife," Tristan said.

"Hey, let's go to Ukyo's before it closes, I'm famished!" Duke said.

"Sure!"

Well, Ranma has made two allies and didn't know about it. How will his dates end up? Who will he choose? These are two hard questions that nobody can answer. For Ranma's sake, he'd better start thinking now. Because next week, Ukyo will really test him. This is going to prove to be one interesting 8 weeks as far as he was concerned.


	3. Ukyo

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Ukyo

by

triviatrap1982

(I don't own Ranma 1/2, Yu-Gi-Oh, or Inuyasha...damn, and if our friend Tenchi thought he had problems with women, then he hadn't met Ranma)

Well, The date with Tea didn't go over so well. However, he had a few more chances though, it would be an excrusiating two days till his date. Today, at school of course, he had to deal with Yugi's usual bitchiness. Though in this form, he coudn't toss Joey and Kaiba holding him back. Though Ishizu, ended up making the three of them stand in the hall for disruption of her class. Though, after class, the war dance of the fighters happened...something that Ranma knew by second nature.

"RANMA I CHALLENGE YOU!" Yugi yelled.

"I accept your challenge, Yugi!" Ranma said.

"PREPARE TO DIE!" Yugi said as he was being held as arm's length by Ranma.

"You know, you can have Tea," Ranma said. "How you put up with her is beyond me."

"Oh, really!" Yugi said. Then with the magic words, he switched to his darker, and more violent half, the pharoh Yami.

"Now, let's fight right here right now!" Yami said as he got a clean, cheap shot off of Ranma's gut.

"Hey cut it out!" Ranma said, as he couldn't defend himself, and Kuno jumped in.

"DIE, RANMA!" Kuno yelled as he was kicking him, and Yami

"OOWW, C'MON GUYS QUIT IT!" Ranma whined.

"KICK HIM IN HIS BALLS!" Yami ordered, and Kuno did that same thing.

"Come guys I mean it, **_OWWW THAT REALLY HURTS!_**" Ranma said.

They continued to pound on Ranma when a fist came directly towards Kuno and knocked him senseless. Yami took this as a sign to get going.

"You may had escaped my wrath for now, but mark my words _I will _return," Yami said as he ran off, to avoid the hard fist of Akane Tendo.

"Damn, we better get you to the nurse's station," Akane said as she picked up Ranma and took him there. However, once at the nurses station, he had an ice pack on his manhood, and he was feeling very, very bad.

"Thanks, Akane," Ranma said.

"You're welcome...it was the least I could do," She answered.

"You know, I think I may had found somebody more stubborn than you,"

"Yeah...too bad he isn't bound by the rules set forth by Nabiki," Ranma said clutching the ice pack to his manhood.

"Ranma, fair warning, don't fuck up," Akane added.

"Akane...I'm in enough pain as it is."

"OK, Ranma, I'll see you later." Akane said as she left the nurses station.

Later on that day, Ranma was healed and he was in no mood to be bothered by those who want to take his head off. Though, Ryoga, with much luck, found his way to Ranma. He saw the abused Ranma, but decided not to let him have it. Ryoga, actually felt sorry for him, because he did help give Ranma a beat down earlier in the year, but he also was on the receiving end.

"What happened!" Ryoga asked suprised.

"I got attacked by Kuno and that Yugi Moto," Ranma admitted.

"Damn, they jumped you...did they?" Ryoga asked, because he knew that a fighter would never hit somebody in the family jewels...even if he deserved it.

"Yeah, hard," Ranma said.

"Well, good luck on your date with, Ukyo," Ryoga said.

"Hey If i should choose anybody, but Akane, you can have at her," Ranma said with a smile.

"Damn, Ranma, you are a true friend."

"Hey, it's what I can do...so how about it an unconditional truce?"

"You got it," Ryoga said as he shook Ranma's hand.

"Thanks," Ranma said. "Now all we have to do is fix your sense of direction, and you can travel outside of Japan."

"It'll take some work," Ryoga said. "But, I've been working on it.

"Good"

"Good, now best of luck to you on Friday."

"You too," Ranma said as he went on his way, to go home.

Ranma has received the worst beat down in his lifetime. Though, he also knew that revenge was something that needed to be put back. The next day, Ranma was home straight after school, to get ready for his date with Ukyo, who had planned their date. Ukyo decided that a private dinner at her house (which was above he restraunt) would be the best. Though, she wasn't planning on anything else to happen. She happened to come to the Tendo house, dressed in her pink sweater and he black skirt.

"Hello," Ukyo said politely.

"Hello, Ukyo," Nabiki said, "he'll be down in a few moments."

"Thanks," She said. "now the incident last week with Tea won't happen this week."

"Well, i've gotten a call from Yugi's grandpa, and he's grounded for as long as Ranma's going to be dating," she informed him.

"Yeah...I owe him an ass-beating for kicking Ranma-honey in his manhood," Ukyo said. She was always tactful when it came to this sort of stuff.

"He did what?" Nabiki said out of suprise. "Well, I guess Yugi owes me 300,000 yen for that little stunt."

"Oh, hey Ukyo," Ranma said as he came down.

"Oh, hey, Ranma-honey, ready," Ukyo said.

"Sure," Ranma said as he took Ukyo's hand and lead her out.

"Have a good time you two," Nabiki said as she went to call Yugi's gramps.

Once they left, they went straight to Ukyo's place...where she closed it down so her date can go out without a hitch. Once at her appartment on the upstairs part, they took off their shoes and well, everything's going as planned.

"Hey, Ranma, sit down and relax," Ukyo said. "I'll make us a very romantic dinner,"

"Sure, Ukyo," Ranma said as he went into her living room and he sat and read a magazine.

"Hey, Ranma, how are you feeling now,"

"Better, than ever," Ranma said.

"Good," Ukyo said. "Hey, I have some martial arts magazines you can look at, no need to look at the teen ones."

"Thanks" Ranma said. "But, I do have a tiny crush on that singer Kikyo though,"

"Ah you too, she's my favorite singer...ever!" Ukyo confirmed.

"Yeah, but I wouldn't date her," Ranma said truthfully.

"Why not?"

"She has a tiny bit of an attitude problem," Ranma said.

"Yeah, she would have to work on that,"

"Hey what's cooking?" He asked as he sniffed smoke.

"AHH, MY DINNER!" Ukyo said as she hurried to the kitchen and smothered the grease fire, and she turned the gas stove off.

"You, ok, Ukyo?"

"Well...why don't I clean up and order a pizza instead?"

"Good Idea," Ranma said.

Well, Ranma got off of his ass and helped Ukyo clean up the mess, then she called for a pizza. 30 minutes later, she got her pizza and payed the girl, and tipped her as well. Ranma ended up getting paper plates and plastic cups so he wouldn't have Ukyo clean up any further. They ate, and they lauged, and they talked about the battles they had, including the one from when they first met. Though after they destroyed the pizza, Ukyo got an Idea.

"Hey, let's go to the karaoke bar?" She suggested.

"Sure," Ranma said. Though he'd rather be his girl type to do that...or really, really drunk.

"Oh, you're the best!" She said

So, they put their shoes back on and went to the karoke bar. Ranma decided to give it a go, because he never did it in his boy form. Though when he went up there, and sang an old Michael Jackson song...he placed with a 85. Which is pretty good for a first timer like Ranma. Then, Ukyo went up and she sang an old Japanese song, and she placed with an 86, slightly better. After they sang the night away, Ukyo decided to take Ranma home.

"You enjoy our date?" Ukyo said.

"You bet," Ranma answered.

"Well, see you later?" She asked.

"Sure, good night," Ranma said as he stole a peck off of her cheek.

"Good night," Ukyo said blushing as she went back home.

"Well how was your date Ranma, my boy?" Genma asked.

"None of your damned business, pops," Ranma answered. "This _is _all your fault you know."

"You'd tell Nabiki over me? You shame your..." Genma stopped as figured Nabiki was behind him.

"FIne, but for 100 yen, you can tell me," Genma said.

"CHEAP BASTARD!" Ranma snapped as he punted Genma out of the house, and into a different district of Tokyo all together.

"Gee Ranma, that wasn't very nice," The eldest tendo sister, Kasumi said.

"Well, Kasumi, when dealing with that old man, you have to be cruel," Ranma said.

"How was your date?" Kasumi asked.

"It went well, despite the fact that Ukyo burned what she was going to cook for dinner."

"Oh my," Kasumi said.

"It was alright, and we ended up going to a Karoke bar after we shared a pizza." Ranma said.

"How'd you do?"

"Got myself an 85"

"How nice," Kasumi said. "The bath is open if you want to use it"

"Thanks, I'll need one after today...I'm still feeling dirty after being jumped."

"Well, good night, Ranma"

"Good night, Kasumi,"

While Ranma went to take his bath, he was thinking. His date with Ukyo went a lot smoother than it did with Tea. He did manage to try something that he never thought he'd be caught dead doing. Though, he was happy, he had seven more dates to go, and it was going to be hard. For now, he just relaxed in the tub and let his worries wash away. Next week would be a new, and even more exciting, or hellish week.


	4. Sango

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Sango

by

triviatrap1982

(I don't own Inuyasah, Yu-Gi-Oh, or Ranma 1/2...trust me it'd be better if I didn't)

Oh, boy! Ranma's first two dates went over very mixed...Tea, well she gave Ranma the friendship speech, and he cut the date short. Ukyo, despite a near fatal kitchen mishap, had a great time. Though now, it was week 3. However, this was the one date that Ranma wishes he didn't have. He knew he had to date Sango, but there was a couple of things that didn't sit well. Though at school, Joey and Kaiba looked at him with some super concern in their faces.

"Hey, Ranma," Joey said. "What are you going to do this week?"

"I'd be lying to you if I said I wasn't worried," Ranma said.

"Well, that's women for you," Kaiba said. "You never know where they're coming from.

"Thanks for the advice guys," Ranma said.

"No problem," Kaiba said. "Now, Joey...it's time we went to teach that Yugi some manners."

"All for it, Kaiba," Joey said. "You just can't kick a man in the family jewels and get away with it,"

"Let's go" Kaiba said.

"Great." Joey said as he led Kaiba out...only to be stopped by Tea.

'Great another friendship speech!', Kaiba, Joey, and Ranma thought at the same time.

"What do you think you're doing?" Tea demanded.

"Don't strain your brain, Tea," Joey said. "Yugi pulled a dirty trick, and you know it!"

"You don't do that to..." Tea started, but was cut off by Kaiba.

"Shh, Tea...nobody gives a shit about those friendship speeches," Kaiba said.

"You...You jerks!" Tea said as she ran away crying.

"It had to be done," Ranma said having been a victem of the same friendship seeches.

"Hey, ain't today Friday?" Joey asked.

"Yep...number 3 Tonight," Ranma said.

"It's like you don't want to be dating at all," Kaiba said.

"Well, I just want to sow my wild oats first, is that so hard to ask?"

"No, it isn't," Joey said.

The three went back to class and they took care of Yami, and Kuno very quickly. Then, later on, Ranma had to get ready for his date to Sango. Though, he didn't know that Sango, had a very unique cat. He got ready wearing his favorite shirt...the, the yellow one with the red bow-tie cliped on the front. As soon as seven Came, Sango came dressed in, something that his own mother wouldn't let him wear in his girl form.

"N-nihao," Ranma Greeted nervously

"Nihao, Ranma," Sango said. She wore, what was basically slut clothes. "Ready for our date."

"Uh-huh," Ranma said.

"Ohh! Good!" Sango said. "Let's go!"

"I'll see you all later," Ranma said. 'If I can survive this.' He thought to himself.

"Man, Ranma doesn't fell well," Ryoga said.

"I know," Soun said. "Perhaps it's the jitters."

"Perhaps, Tendo," Soun said after he had to hitch a ride back home. "He won't tell me what happend on his date last week!"

"He just doesn't trust you," Nabiki said.

Meanwhile...Ranma and Sango went to a rave club where they were playing hard techno. However, Ranma wasn't the best dancer in the world, so he ended up using his martial arts training to help him out...big time. The fans crowded and gathered around Ranma and stared, some of them started doing moves he was doing, and everybody joined in. Though after, they left the club, and Sango needed to get home and get something.

"Hey, I left my phone at home," Sango said. "You wouldn't mind if we stopped off and got it do you?

"No, let's go," Ranma said.

As soon as they got to Sango's house, however...Ranma didn't notice the sabre-toothed cat that was sitting on the couch. When he sat down, the same cat woke up and saw him. Though, he still didn't know untill he heard the one thing that would start to freak him out. That is, he'd flip into the catfist, if she wasn't put into a different room and at once.

"Meow,"

"C-C-CCAT!" Ranma freaked as he hopped off of the couch.

"What's going on!" Sango yelled rushing out of her room, with her phone.

"I HATE CATS!" Ranma yelled.

"I see, you have an unrational, yet reasonable fear of cats, ok then," Sango said as she picked up the cat and set her in her bedroom.

"Wow, thanks," Ranma said.

"Sorry," Sango said as she closed the door so that her cat wouldn't get out. "I should had told you about Kirara"

"That's ok," Ranma said. "I should had told you about my fear of cats...thanks to the old man."

"What did Genma do to you?"

"Ever hear of Cat-Fu?"

"You mean?"

"Yeah, freestyle, cat-fist fighting...wrap the subject in fish sausage, and toss him into a pit of starving cats," Ranma said recalling the horror of that day.

"Damn...you poor thing!" Sango said.

Sango, hated perverts, but from what Ranma told her, she hated Genma even more. Though when they walked down to the sidewalk, Inuyasha was with Miroku. Though, Inuyasha was smiling broadly at Ranma. He was either, happy to get rid of Kagome for a little while, _or _he was ready to kill Ranma, and use his manhood as a part of Tetsaiga.

"So, Saotome, you unlucky fucker," Inuyasha said.

"What do you mean by that," Sango said.

"Easy, he has to date two short tempered girls," Inuyasha said.

"What do you mean?" Miroku asked.

"Kagome, and this...Akane woman," Inuyasha answered.

"Well, I get to date Akane last," Ranma said.

"Well, now, I hope your date is going well," Miroku said as he groped Sango's ass.

"Pervert!" she said as she smacked him dead in his face.

"Damn, shot down again." Miroku said in defeat.

"Would help if you didn't grope them," Inuyasha said.

"Oh, would you two let Kirara out?" Sango asked.

"With pleasure," Miroku said.

"Let's go Ranma"

"Alright," Ranma said as Sango took them to the Cat Cafe.

At the Cat Cafe, Cologne, made them her very special Ramen. Of course, she couldn't interfere with her future son-in-law. Though, she did like his choices in fiancees, even if they were forced. She looked his date over and smiled. Shampoo came and she resisted the urge to glmop Ranma. However, Shampoo, did have a plan to stay out of the way.

"Well, son-in-law," Cologne said. "You have a fine choice in women indeed."

"Thank you," Ranma said being polite...which is a first between him and the Amazon elder.

"Well, now, you're Sango right?" Cologne asked.

"Yes, ma'am," Sango said.

"Well, now son-in-law, you're not half-bad at all," She said.

"Well, Ranma, I know that you were forced to be engaged to Shampoo...how is Cologne very significant?" Sango asked.

"Well, she taught me the chestnut fist," Ranma started, "then she taught me the Heavenly Dragon Ascention Wave."

"He also beat great-grandmother with cat-fist," Shampoo said as she brought out the Ramen for the both of them.

"Ah, yes, I remember that," Cologne said. "Best workout I had in years," She laughed.

"Wow," Sango said.

"Where Mousse at?" Shampoo asked.

"That damned slacker," Cologone hissed. "Shampoo watch them and make sure they're comfortable...I gotta go find that blind freeloader."

"I'm right here you old hag!" Mousse hissed and he was in his jacket.

"Well why haven't you shown up today, Mr. Part-timer!" Cologne demanded.

"I was planning the downfall of Ranma Saotome!" He said triumphantly.

"Mousse, quit your stupid talking!" Shampoo said.

"Shampoo!" he said dreamily, as Kirara wandered into the restraunt.

"Ranma prepare to die!"

"Meow!" Kirara said.

"Shit...that cat..." Ranma said as he freaked out.

"Oh, no..." Sango said. Though it was too late, Ranma had flipped into cat fist, and frightened Kirara back into Sango's arms.

"This is no trick!" Mousse said.

"RROOOWWWW!"

"What's the matter with him!" Sango asked.

"That be catfist, Sango," Cologne replied. "In this state, it is usless to talk him back to reality."

"Very tragic, for Mousse, Yes?" Shampoo said.

"Very tragic indeed, because Mousse will be docked pay," Cologne said.

"Wow, I should learn a few things from you," Sango said.

Well, Ranma chased Mousse around, hissing, and spitting. Though after a few minutes, Ranma defeated the blind-as-hell martial artist very good. There was that one small matter of bringing him back to reality. That meant calling Akane to come and take him home, and to snap him out of the catfist. Once, Akane came she called him over, and appologized to Sango.

"It's ok," Sango said. "My Kirara, gave him the strenght to defeat that idiot."

"Well, Sango...if it isn't too much trouble would you like to date him again."

"No way! I'm sorry, but I'm not the girl for him," Sango said.

"What you mean?" Shampoo asked.

"The cat," Sango answered.

"Oh, yes, that problem," Cologne said. "It's nice to see a girl know when she has to give up and let go."

"I won't, however, rule him out being a friend, Akane." Sango said.

"Well, ok," Akane said

"Should I deliver the ramen to your house, Akane?" Cologne asked.

"Yes, no sense in letting it go spoiled," She said.

"Alright, It'll be there in a few minutes.

Well, Akane had Ranma calmed down enough to tell him what happened. Ranma needed it because he couldn't remember anything after being released from the lock of the catfist. Though, the date didn't end the way it wanted to. However, Sango did slip him a piece of paper with her phone number so they could just sit and talk about everything. As for Akane, she still has a long ways to go to make Ranma the happiest man in Japan...no the entire world.


	5. Kodachi

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Kodachi

by

triviatrap1982

(You all know the drill, I do not own Ranma 1/2, Inuyasha, or Yu-Gi-Oh, got it!)

The week came and went, as Ranma had went out with three women in three weeks. This time, he'd have to go out with one woman, that worked his nerves...and didn't care if he was in his girl form. Kodacahi Kuno, Tatewaki Kuno's sister, was the master of paralysis and knockout drugs. In short, if she were to ruin a date, she'd go out in a blaze of glory. However, she wanted just _one _thing. She wanted to get laid by him and nothing else.

"Man, I want him in my bed!" Kodachi snapped.

"You wish," Kuno said. "I can't get with the pig-tailed girl, so you can't get with that fiend, Saotome."

'Idiot,' Kodachi thought to herself. 'Doesn't he know that his dream pig-tailed girl and Ranma are one and the same?'

"Anyway, if thou makes haste...that lecher, Saotome, well be here any moment."

"Kuno, _I'm _going to end up with him rather you want me to or not!" Kodachi snapped.

"Well, you're just as..." Kuno started as he started to feel...drowzy. "...I...hate...you."

"Well, I _had _to put the sleeping substance in your orange juice," Kodachi said with a smile on her face. "Now, you _can't _mess with my Ranma-darling! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Then, Kuno fell asleep as he fell on the floor, Sasuke, their loyal and noble chore-boy was summoned. He was small in stature, however, he wasn't the type to mess with. Alright, so he has a few brain cells fried from being Kodachi's lab rat for her experiments.

"Sasukue, take Kuno out of my sight," Kodachi said.

"Yes, as you wish," Sasuke said as he took Kuno to his bedroom.

"Now, Saotome," Kodachi started, "your ass is mine,"

Well, Kodachi was ready to go. However, she was dressed in even worse clothing that would make even all of Ranma's other dates blush. She wore a sheer top which showed off her womanly assets (she did it on purpose). She also wore a low-cut pair of blue jeans which, showed off her thong (in which case, she was showing that she was desperate). However, when she went to the Tendo house...she made no illusions on what she wanted to do.

"Hello, all!" Kodachi greeted.

"H-hello, Kodachi," Ranma said uneasily.

"Wow, you've _got _to be kidding me," Akane said as she took a look at what Kodachi was wearing.

"You simple woman," Kodachi started, "by the time this is over, _I'll _have Ranma to myself."

"Gee, don't want you to catch a cold," Akane said. "Anyway, I have _better _things to do."

"Like putting your hands between your legs?" Kodachi said coldly. However, Akane has done something that she hadn't been able to do, hold her temper.

"Whatever," Akane said and went back to the family room to watch some television, as Kodachi dragged Ranma off to his required date. After they've left, Kodachi ended up taking him to the giant ferris wheel, that is well known in Tokyo. To make things better...or worse depinding on how you look at it...it was small and intimate.

"Ranma, aren't you enjoying yourself?" Kodachi asked.

"Y-Yes," Ranma said as he knew that Kodachi wanted to bang him.

"Good!" Kodachi said as she put her foot between Ranma's crotch.

"Kodachi?" Ranma asked.

"Oh, sorry," She said insincerely.

"Thanks," Ranma said. He may had been unfairly tagged a pervert, but he wasn't ready for _that _yet.

"No problem," She said with a smile on her face.

Then after the ride they ended up going to a night club to dance. Ranma saw tea there with Kaiba and they were having a good time. However, Ranma decided not to let it get in the way of what he needed to do. When Kodachi dragged them to the dance floor...she did some dance moves that were, sexual against Ranma. Then, Shampoo saw Kodachi and decided to drop a dime to Nabiki.

"Hello," Nabiki said on the other end.

"Nihao, blackmail girl, I have news," Shampoo said.

"What about?"

"Kodachi is acting like slut," The amazon said.

"You may not interfere," Nabiki said.

"I pay you 100,000 yen," Shampoo said.

"No way, if things get out of hand, then you may interfere." Nabiki said.

Shapoo nodded and hung up the payphone. Though, Shampoo saw the opportunity when Kodachi tried to take Ranma's innocence away from him. Shampoo went over and decided to be a hero to Ranma Saotome. She went up to Kodachi and she interrupted her perverted dance.

"What you doing!" Shampoo snapped.

"None of your business," Kodachi hissed.

"You try to take Ranma's manhood!" Shampoo snapped as she was ready to beat the shit out of Kodachi.

"If that's the way you want it!" Kodachi said as she pushed Ranma aside and he left when he back was turned.

"You now have to die," Shampoo said.

Ranma and a few of the other men, including Kaiba made it out before the situation got very very bad. Then, when Ranma got home, he saw Kaiba there as well. He wanted to know what he wanted with him. Hopefully he didn't piss him hof to the point he did Yugi...who's still grounded.

"Hey, Kaiba what brings you here?" Ranma asked

"Well, that very bad bitch fight from eariler tonight," Kaiba said.

"At least your date wasn't as horny as Kodachi, good grief!" Ranma said.

"I know, you better cut her out of the running and send her a vibrator," Kaiba said coldly.

"You know...at this point, I'd rather do perverted things to myself in my girl form," Ranma said.

"Well, Ranma, I do have one thing to tell you..I do not blame you...and I've gotten Yugi ungrounded."

"Why'd you do that?" Ranma said.

"I've sent him to Jusenkyo on my dime," Kaiba answered.

"I hope he falls in the spring of the drowned girl," Ranma said.

"Well, now, I hope he learns some humility very fast."

"I do too,"

The next morning, Yugi shows up at the tendo household, very pissed off.

"Morning," Ranma said.

"What's so good about it," Yugi said as she swtiched to his darker, and even more pissed off self.

"Now, take me to the shower," He ordered.

"Alright...but I wan't Akane here so she won't accuse me of doing anything perverted,"

"HAH! I hate do dissapoint you, _but I don't swing that way," _

"Same to you pal," Ranma said as he went to take him to the bathroom. As soon as the two boys walked in...Kodachi was in the tub completely naked. and smiling.

"THE HELL?" The boys so eloquently put it.

"Ranma darling take me!" she said as the two ran out of the bathroom and were panting hard.

"Ranma..." Akane started.

"Akane...get some clothes for Kodachi, and _please _send her on her way," Ranma said. "She's a worse pervert than her brother!"

"I see," Akane said as she saw Kodachi in the tub waiting for Ranma. However, Kodachi was in for a rude awakening.

"Kodachi...get dried up, and get dressed, and get the hell out of my house," Akane ordered.

"You...you...", Kodachi tried to get out, but couldn't.

"Now," Akane said.

"Fine," Kodachi said as she got dried up, dressed, and went back on her way home. Though there was still that one matter of the now cursed Pharoh.

Then Ranma splashed Yami with cold water...and he, became a she, just like Ranma. Though, Akane was very suprised and well, speechless. Well, the date with Kodachi went very, very badly However, Ranma does have a few more to go, and it's going to be hard from here on out. As for Yami however, he appologized for every bad thing he's done to Ranma, and even gave Duke Deblin something to cry about.


	6. Serenity

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Serenity

by

triviatrap1982

(If i must...I don't own Ranma 1/2, Yu-Gi-Oh, or Inuyasha you damn ambulance chasers)

Well, Ranma's date with Kodachi went very horribly wrong. She dressed like the sluttiest of sluts, she ended up in his bathtub naked trying to take his manhood (or woman hood depending on which form he's in), and she got into a fight with Shampoo. Though, he had a new fresh start with Serenity, Joey's sister. Ranma realized that his life, essentially was on the line, since well, she is Joey's sister.

"Ranma, what's with the long face?" Joey asked.

"I gotta date your sister," Ranma said.

"Well, as long as you don't hurt her, you'll be alright," Joey said.

"Hey, how's Yugi doing?" Ranma asked.

"Well...that Idiot Kuno is trying to get into his pants," Joey said. "It's a shame he fell in the spring of drowned woman,"

"Well, Kaiba's been in a pissy mood, turns out that Yugi had something for him." Ranma said as he saw a girl-type Kaiba and a girl-type Yugi.

"DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK!" Joey said in true suprise.

"MASTER WHEELER!" the teacher yelled as he chucked an eraser at his head. "GO STAND IN THE HALL!"

"Yes sir," Joey said softly as he went to hold two buckets of water in the hall. Though, he was used to it when he went to Domino high school

"Uh...Kaiba," Ranma started.

"It's Yugi's fault," Kaiba said, in a very femine voice. "I should had known that Yugi'd bring back that water and get me back big time."

"Well, It's your damn fault for getting me ungrounded and sending me to Jusenkyo," Yugi said in his boy form.

"Well, hot water'll take care of that right away," Ranma said as he excused himself, Kaiba, and Yugi to the PE equipment room.

Later on, after they got Kaiba in his true form...

"How can you do it?" Kaiba and Yugi asked.

"One day at a time," Ranma said as he saw Joey smiling.

"What are you smiling about?" Kaiba demanded.

"Easy, what would happen if Ranma was in his girl form on his date." Joey answered.

"Well, I hope she isn't sex-crazed like Kodachi," Ranma said.

"Yeah, It's a good thing she goes to a different school," Yugi said.

"Damn, it went that bad?" Joey and Kaiba asked.

"Yeah, you both didn't have the displeasure of seeing her naked," Yugi said, as Kuno saw them, and was fuming.

"So, Saotome, Kodachi put it out, and you reject?" Kuno asked.

"You're an idiot," Kaiba said. "Your sister is the biggest slut _this _side of the Pacific Ocean."

"You dare speak ill of my sister!" Kuno snapped.

"Boys," Ishizu said coming out of her room, "don't you have somewhere you need to be?"

"Going," Ranma, Yugi, and Kaiba said.

"I'm stuck here," Joey said.

"Well...um...that is," Kuno struggled.

"I'll see you after school master Kuno," Ishizu said.

"Yes ma'am," Kuno said as he went back to his class very patheticly.

Though, later on that day...and it was Friday, Ranma got home and he got ready for his date with Serenity. She was nicer than most girls Ranma had met, and this includes Kasumi. Then at the appoointed hour of seven, she came and she was dressed and ready to go. Even her voice was niacer and sweeter than most girls that Ranma's met, and/or dated.

"Hello, is Ranma here?" Serenity asked.

"I'll get him," Kasumi said as she went upstairs and got Ranma who was dressed in his good clothes.

"I'm ready, Serenity," Ranma said as he took her hand and led her out to a restruant.

"Hey, Ranma," Serenity said, "can you tell me a little bit about yourself."

"Sure," Ranma said. "I'm a pig-tailed martial artist, who's a girl half the time,"

"Why is that?" Serenity asked as a woman dumped cold water on Ranma, and he turned to a she.

"Nevermind," Serenity said.

"Well, no use in going to get hot water, better make the most of it," Ranma-chan said.

"Alright, I know a restraunt where we can have a small intimate dinner." Serenity said.

"Lead the way," Ranma said.

They then happened to a restraunt which was very, very intimate in the atmosphere. They took their seat and they started talking about life, and other things. Unlike Tea who _barely _let Ranma get a word out, or Kodachi who was too pushy...Serenity was mentally balanced. She then talked about her bond with Joey, which made Ranma smile, since he _is _one of the newer friends that he made.

"Serenity if this doesn't work out," Ranma said. "I'd like for you to be my friend."

"I will," Serenity said. "I don't have very many enemies or friends."

"Well, here's the menu," Ranma said. He didn't bring enough money for two people.

"Ranma, order whatever you'd like," Serenity said. "I'm paying, _and _I have a suprise for you."

"Alright," Ranma said. However, he didn't know that Sango and Miroku were there, and they listend in on the entire thing.

"Well, now, isn't this nice," Sango said to Miroku.

"Yes it is," Miroku said keeping his hands to himself...for once.

"I have a feeling that she's the one for him," Sango said.

"There are girls after her you know," Miroku pointed out.

"Yeah, but hopefully he'll make the right choice."

"If he chooses you, then Kirara would be the death of him," He said.

"True." Sango answered. Meanwhile back with Ranma and Serenity, they ordered their food.

"Thank you," Ranma and Serenity both said to the waiter who relayed the order to the chef in the kitchen.

Ranma and Serenity both talked some more and a good few minutes later, their orders were ready. The food was great, and they both had dessert after. (But Ranma turned back to a he when he spilled the soup over himself.) When Serenity paied the full bill, _and _gave a monster tip to the waiter, they went to the park. The sun was goiing to set in fifteen minutes and they just made it to the swings. Serenity loved seeing sunsets and wanted to share it with her date.

"Wow, this is incredible," Ranma said as he saw the sun setting.

"Yes, it is," Serenity said. "I love seeing sunsets from the roof every night,"

"I can see why," Ranma answered as he continued to take the image of the sunset in...because it might be the last time.

"Ranma," Serenity said. "If we were to get together, I wouldn't mind if you were as a boy or a girl"

"You're the first one who actually have no problem with it," Ranma said. "Just be greatful your brother isn't a panda."

"_Oh, so that's who was playing shogi, _I never knew your dad was such an idiot," Serenity said.

"That's the truth," Ranma answered.

They then got home from the park and Ranma actually enjoyed his date with Serenity. However, Serenity did steal her first kiss from him, and she loved it. She then thanked him and went home to her Joey who was waiting for her. When Ranma got inside, he was happy, and he had a huge smile on his face. Akane saw this and she decided not to lose her cool, which would hurt her in the long run.

"I take it your date went well," Akane said.

"For the first time in two weeks," Ranma said, not forgetting his date with Ukyo.

"Well, Ranma, I hope you've enjoyed that date with Serenity," Akane said.

"Acutally, I did, Akane, and I hope the rest go just as well," Ranma said, with a tinge of uncertainty.

"Well, Ranma, sleep well."

"You too"

Ranma went changed his clothes and he went to bed. However, he had the room to himself since Genma was sleeping in Soun's bedroom. Getting kicked out everyday was a burdon that he rather not live. Ranma then thought about his remaining dates. To his credit he did have just the two that went well. Even though, he still has no idea of what Akane Tendo or the others are planning.


	7. Kagome

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Kagome

by

triviatrap1982

(I don't own Ranma 1/2, Yu-Gi-Oh, or Inuyasha, If I did, own Inuyasha, Sesshomaru would be getting a girl for himself)

Well, last Friday was the best date that Ranma Saotome has ever had. How can his newest date, Kagome, measure up? No doubt that this was going to be a very hard act to follow. Though, It was Wednesday, and Ranma was listening to his favorite singer, Kikyo. Though she looked like Kagome through looks...she was a better singer. Though, Ranma got such a start when Kaiba tapped him on his shoulder.

"Kaiba...what's up?" Ranma asked nervously.

"How the hell do you do it?" Kaiba asked. "How the hell do you cope with being 1/2 girl?"

"Easy, I just use the curse as a blessing," Ranma said.

"I see...well, If that's the case then I should buy some women's clothes." Kaiba said.

"Well, I'll take you to get some outfits that would be to your advantage," Ranma said. His Chinese fighting outfits adapted to his body whenever he changed to a girl.

"Well, Thanks," Kaiba said.

"You're welcome...hey where's your brother at?" Ranma then asked.

"Well, I'm getting away from him for a while...I never knew Mokuba could be so heartless," Kaiba answered.

"What he found a vibrator?" Ranma asked.

"Yes he did, and he used it against me in my girl form," Kaiba said.

"Damn, that sucks," Ranma said as he went back to listening to his CD.

"Yeah, it does," Kaiba said.

Well, Ranma went back to goofing off, until the end of the day. When he went home he was met up by Inuyasha. This silver haired, half-breed of a dog demon came smiling. He went out with Kikyo after a bitter break-up with Kagome. He was ready to dispense some advice to the cursed martial artist. However, Kasumi was well, drooling over him, something that was not in her nature.

"Hey, Inuyasha, what brings you here?" Ranma asked.

"Well, I'm here to give you some advice," Inuyasha said. "I'm aware you're going out with my ex-girlfriend, Kagome."

"Oh, no...anything I should do?" Ranma asked.

"Don't let her put that beaded Rosary around you're neck...you will die by her hand."

"I thought you still had that?"

"Well, I do have it, but she has had a second one made, and you _don't _want that piece of jewlery," Inuyasha said.

"Thanks for the advice," Ranma said.

"No problem...I gotta get going before Kikyo kills me,"

"You're dating Kikyo?"

"Yep, suprised?"

"I'm proud and happy."

"Good," Inuyasha said as he went off to meet Kikyo at the airport for her concert in Canada...he was also her roadie.

Well, Ranma sweated it out when Friday came and he got ready. Kagome was waiting for him, and she wasted no time showing her ugly side. She chewed him out for being late...even though it was only five in the afternoon. Secondly, they were taking a trip to Tokyo's entertainment district to go to the arcade. Ranma did remember, Inuyasha's advice, and dire warning...she had the beaded Rosary.

"Hey, Kagome," Ranma said. "Can you put that away please?"

"Fine," Kagome said as she handed it to Nabiki...who could do damage to Soun, Kuno, or Genma...if she choose.

"Well, have a good time you love birds," Nabiki said.

"I'll try," Ranma said softly.

"We'll see you soon!" Kagome said.

Kagome and Ranma made the 1/2 hour trip to the entertainment district of Tokyo. That is...it's a damn good thing that Saotome got himself a ton of money...because this date was costing him money out the ass. It cost them both 440 yen a piece for the train ride, and the arcade costs 1,000 yen for 50 tokens to use the machines. Kagome decided that she'd play DDR Extreme. Ranma got himself 100 tokens and played a shooter game.

"Got you," Ranma said softly. He then got his tickets for breaking the high scores...meanwhile...

"Damn it," Kagome snapped. She had gotten an "F" on DDR Extreme, she wasn't exactly graceful like Tea, nor did she have any rhythm.

"Well, Kagome, how'd you do?" Ranma asked innocently.

"Fuck off!" Kagome snapped.

'Normally, I wouldn't hit a woman, _but _she's tempting me to make an exception to the rule,' Ranma thought to himself.

"Hey, Kagome," Ranma said. "Why don't you try some of the other games, you'll get lucky."

"Oh, ok, Ranma," Kagome said as she headed over to the fighter game. "Sorry for taking your head off...it's a bad habit of mine."

"That's ok," Ranma said. He was used to it for two straight years when Akane put the hurting on him.

"It seems you're used to a woman, taking out anger on you," Kagome said.

"Well, I've lived with some very, very violent girls," Ranma said, truthfully.

"Oh, I see...let's get as many tickets as we can and get some prizes," Kagome said.

"Alright!" Ranma said excitedly.

They then proceeded to spend all of their tokens and get as many Tickets as they could. Then when they were finished they had enough tickets to get some decent prizes. That is, there were some plushies of both of their favorite animes sitting there. Ranma, he enjoyed the comedy animes...to keep his mind off of the buffoonery that happens in his real life. So he choose the Kaolla plushie (he loves Love Hina to death). Kagome she took the Kenshin plushie (since she loves that series as well).Then, they took a cab to a fast food joint and started to eat...when trouble brewed.

"Hey, toots, give me your wallet and you won't get hurt," The thug said.

"Fuck off," Kagome said...she had no intentions on co-operating...and her ex-boyfriend's older brother Sesshomaru, was there with Shippo and Rin.

"I said..." The thug started, but Ranma had his index and middle finger to his throat.

"The lady said go away," Ranma said. "If you can't get it, then I'll make you get it."

"So that's the way you want to play it," a second thug said...though, this time, Sesshomaru was _right _behind him.

"They said leave them alone," Sesshomaru said. "Secondly, why haven't you two been to my office last week?"

"Shit...you're...their...probation officer?" Ranma asked.

"Yep, now you two get home and think about why I shouldn't send you to prision," Sesshomaru ordered...and the two thugs booked it.

"Thanks," They both said.

"You're welcome," Sesshomaru said. "Now I must get back to Rin and Shippo...they're dating, and well, as a father, I'm very worried."

"I understand, big time," Ranma said.

"Well, enjoy your date, Master Saotome," Sesshomaru said as he went back with his two charges.

"That was interesting," Kagome said, while Ranma nodded.

Well, later on, they had left the fast food joint, and they took the trip back to Furinkan. Though, Kagome's bad habit was catching up with her very fast, and poor Ranma was going to pay for it...big time.

"So, how'd you enjoy your date?"

"It fuckin' sucked thanks to you!" Kagome snapped.

"I don't know what's worse...you or Kodachi throwing herself on me!" Ranma returned

"Well, at _least _I didn't need a full-on demon to save my ass," Kagome hissed.

"You know, Kagome, I'll _walk _the rest of the way home." Ranma said as he pulled the stop bell on the bus.

"That'll take you all night!" Kagome said.

"I'm used to it," Ranma said. "I've swam all the way to China before so it is nothing,"

Ranma exited the bus and left Kagome jilted, and on the lonely ride of shame back to Furinkan. Once home, Ranma smiled and he went to the bath and took a long, and deserving bath. It wasn't in his nature to leave a woman behind, but Kagome just deserved it. However, in Japan, sharing a bath with another man wasn't uncommon. Ranma, Kaiba, Yugi, and Joey were in the bath, and well, they talked about the date.

"YOU WHAT?" Joey asked out of pure suprise.

'Yep, she left me no choice," Ranma answered.

"I'm very suprised you didn't leave Tea alone," Yugi said.

"Me too, though now, you made her take the ride of shame," Kaiba said

"Now, I hope my date with Shampoo goes over well," Ranma said.

"I noticed something, only two of your dates went well...and that cut a lot of those girls out of the running," Joey observed.

"It's still my choice, Joey, and we're all human," Ranma added.

"Hn, that's something to think about Saotome," Yugi said. "Now, what do you say we make Genma's life a living hell?"

"Actually, my mom's doing that," Ranma said, as his mother came to visit...and she freaks out when she sees girl form.

"_Oh, boy, not her!_" Joey said,a but dramatically.

"Yep, she'll be here for a week," Ranma said.

"Well, you bettter choose wisely," The three wise, and dateless men said.

"I know," Ranma said.

Well, once Kagome came back to Furinkan, and it took her a good two hours because of traffic, she was pissed that Ranma left her. However, there was absolutely nothing that she could do about it. As for Ranma's dates...he just has his dates with Shampoo, Mai, and Akane were coming up. Joey, Yugi, and Ranma were right, with Ranma's mama, he'd best to choose wisely, or suffer a worse hell than falling into the Spring of Drowned Girl.

Correction

Thanks for those who caught my second screw up in as many days. (Honestly i never did make it to seeing Ranma 1/2 season 7 at all)


	8. Shampoo

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Shampoo

by

triviatrap1982

(You all should know what _I _don't own by now, if you don't it's Ranma 1/2, Inuyasha, and Yu-Gi-Oh!...oh and thanks to the reviewers who caught my name screw up with Ranma's Mama)

Well, Ranma had three agonizing weeks to go for his dates and his choice of his fiancee...and possibly his wife. His next date was going to be technical to say the least. His latest date, Shampoo, is a very, very how should we say...determined Chinese Amazon. Though, he'd have to plan this one out very carefully. Ranma has had some bad experiences with Shampoo. One of which was going to repeat itself.

"Yes, yes!" Shampoo said as she waited for the timer to go off. She had gotten those mind-controll mushrooms to try to influence Ranma.

"Well, what are you cooking?" Cologne asked.

"A little suprise for Ranma," Shampoo said with a smile on her face.

"I see...you're screwing around with those mind control mushrooms again," Cologne said.

"What you talking about?" Shampoo said of false suprise.

"The same mushrooms that ended up having people sneezing for Ranma to hug them," Cologne said.

"You want to try?" Shampoo said...though the result was the same as the last time.

"No way! You try it!" Cologne countered...she knew what would happen.

"What you crazy!" Shampoo snapped.

The oven bell rang very, fucking loudly. This definately got Shampoo's attention, as she went to the oven and got the tainted pork rolls. She still needed a test subject to see if they would work. She decided that she'd go and bother, Tristan with it. So, after she had to clean up Cologne's stainless steel kitchen, she headed out in the busy city streets. She ended up finding Tristan thanks to Joey who was on his way there to collect money...wait, Joey would do, since he had an appetite the size of a starving Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon.

"Hey, Shampoo, what's in the picnic basket?" Joey asked...starving after a hard day of School...it was Thursday afterall.

"NIhao, Joey," Shampoo said. "These special pork rolls I make for Ranma."

"Hey may I have a taste?" Joey asked as Tristan came out.

"Man you're desparate for food, you know that," Tristan Said.

"Watch it monkey breath!" Joey said. "I seem to recall that _you _used to eat white school paste when we were in Kindergarden."

"Shut the fuck up, Joseph!" Tristan snapped.

Well, this was going to get interesting...so Shampoo picked up and took advantage of the situation. She offered the both of them a taste they took a taste of the tainted rolls. They both ate it, and with the snap of her finger, they were...making out in front of the brown brick appartment building, and people were watching. After she snapped her fingers again...Joey was about to pound Tristan.

"You ignorant...now I need to wash my mouth out with soap!" Joey snapped.

"Me ignorant!" Tristan snapped. "You need to brush and floss your teeth!"

"Says you monkey breath!" Joey said...recalling Tristan's short stint in a mechnical monkey.

"That's it, you're dead you ugly blonde goblin!" Tristan said.

"Bring it, cow-lick!" Joey yelled, just as he got Tristan in a crossface...on solid concrete...in front of hundreds of people.

"UNCLE!" Tristan yelled.

"That'll teach you!" Joey said as he popped Tristan upside his head and ran upstairs.

"You're so dead!" Tristan said as he chased after him.

"It's set," Shampoo said to herself as she headed home and she got the evidence she had that she did the mind-control food right.

She went home and she made sure that she had her receipe for disaster handy. Cologne, however, knew where this was going so she dropped a call to her potential son-in-law. She explained that her purple-haired devil of a great-granddaughter was going to make a very tragic mistake. Ranma, however, decided that it would be time to play a trick on Shampoo...and let Colonge and Mousse in on it.

"Well," Ranma said. "Why don't you make a un-tainted batch of pork rolls, and switch them?"

"Good idea," Cologne said. "You're not half-bad, Ranma."

"Thanks," Ranma said. "As for mousse, you save the tainted ones for him, and _you _control him."

"Good Idea...would get him to do some work around here!" Cologne snapped.

"See you tomorrow," Ranma said.

"See you then," Cologne said as she hung up the phone.

'Well, Shampoo, your plan has backfired already,' Cologne thought to herself as she got cracking with the replacements.

The grey-haired Amazon elder had worked tirelessly through the night to make the safe rolls. Then, when the morning came, she was finished...and she was dead tired. She didn't even sleep in. She swtiched the pork rolls and she hid the tainted ones from Shampoo. Shampoo came down, and she was smiling.

"Morning!" She said happily.

"A good morning child," Cologne said as she hopped about on her giant wooden cane. "What are you doing up so early?"

"I have date with Ranma," Shampoo said. "I go get ready now."

"You do that...and while you're up there, tell Mousse he has to come in today for delivery." Cologne said.

"Sure thing!" She said as she bounded upstairs and she went to take her shower.

However, meanwhile, Kaiba saw Joey and Tristan in their green Furinkan jumpsuits, still pissed with each other about yesterday. Joey was ready to drive somebody into the brittle concrete walkway as he needed an excuse to fight. Tristan wanted the same thing, and Kaiba just _had _to ask. Though, neither of them could take Kaiba on, even if they jumped him.

"What happened?" Kaiba asked.

"Well, this nasty fucker decided that he wanted to kiss me!" Joey snapped.

"It was your Idea dumbass!" Tristan snapped.

"You know, _I will _drive you six feet under if you say one more thing," Joey promised...and he always followed through.

"Bring it!" Tristan said as he charged Joey...and got driven six feet through the concrete they _just _replaced.

"Damn!" Kaiba said backing off. "Joey...how about we go find ourselves some chics?"

"Kaiba, that's cool," Joey said as tristan was driven down to the ground...knocked out.

"Let's go," Kaiba said.

Later on, it was a tense day...Ranma was scared, because he knew that Shampoo would try to do something very, very stupid. Tristan and Joey were ready to have a brawl, that would make Japanese pro wrestling seem tame. Though, when the end of the day came, Ranma booked it back home, and he didn't look back. Once home, he saw that Shampoo was already waiting for him...and she was Ready.

"Nihao," Shampoo greeted with a sly smile across her face, as she had the pure pork rolls in her picnic basket.

"Nihao," Ranma greeted back.

"Airen ready for date?" Shampoo asked.

"Yeah," Ranma said. He didn't have to change or shower, since his gym teacher was out with a cold today.

"Let's go!" She said, and she snatched Ranma up and took him to the park.

"Wow, she's in a hurry," Ryoga said.

"Um-hum," Mousse said. "I was supposed to be in, but I know what that old ghoul is up too, and It ain't going to work!"

"Wow, so you knew she was going to use the tainted rolls on you, eh?"

"Would help if I wasn't right by Ranma when he got the call."

"Harsh, but I like it."

"Yep,"

At the park, Shampoo thought she had everything planned. She had some soda ready, since they both were underage to drink sake. She also had the food spread out. Then she whipped out the pork rolls, rice balls with tuna in it, and of course, some raw vegitables that she packed at the last minute. She gave Ranma his meal as they sat on the traditional red and white checkered blanket, on the green hillside.

"Wow," Ranma said. "You picked the best day to do this."

"Happy, yes?" Shampoo

"Very happy," Ranma said.

Shampoo decided to snap her fingers, but it didn't have an effect on Ranma.

"Shampoo, you're cute, but you ain't that cute," He said.

"What you mean?" Shampoo asked.

"I had your great-grandma switch your pork rolls," Ranma answered

"Why you do that?"

"As sure as this sky is blue, I've went through that once already," Ranma said.

"Oh," Shampoo said simply as the wind was blowing her very short, red Chinese silk dress, with the orchid patterens on it.

"Sorry," Ranma said. "Also, Mousse ain't going near your place now, he knew."

Shampoo was getting pissed, so she whipped out her maces and was ready to kill boy-type Ranma instead. Though, she got shot a look that if he dies then _everbody _including her is out of the running. She put them away, but she cut the date short on her own accord. Simply because of the heads up that gave it away to both Ranma and Mousse. She packed everything up, and went home...she even rudely took the blanet from under Ranma. As he went home, he went to Mousse and said this.

"She's all yours, Mousse," Ranma said.

"It didn't go well?" Mousee asked..

"Nope, she's pissed and she's ready to kill somebody," He answered.

"I hope your next one goes...better than that." Mousse said.

"I hope so too."

So, this was the first time that happened to Ranma in seven weeks, the girl broke off the date. Cologne destroyed the original pork rolls since they weren't going to do her any good. Mousse never showed up for his job and he gave himself an excuse not to show up to work. As for Saotome...he had two more dates to go, Mai Valentine, and Akane Tendo...hopefully they'll go well.


	9. Mai

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Mai

by

triviatrap1982

(Will the real owners of Ranma 1/2, Yu-Gi-Oh, and Inuyasha please stand up?)

Well, Ranma's date with Shampoo went shorter than expected. It did take him a while to talk her out of trying to kill the remaining two dates. (Well she couldn't as it was a breach of the rules). He now has two dates to go...and he has to make it count. Ranma has also checked around to make sure that he didn't have any more fiancees. To his luck, finally, he has no more. His mother, Mrs. Nodoka Saotome was staying an extra two weeks to see how manly he could be. Though complaining was _out _of the question. Though he didn't mind dating all these women, and actually live.

"Hey mom!" Ranma said. "Guess what?"

"What?" Nodoka asked.

"I have two more dates to go, then I get to make the very difficult choice."

"Oh, I see," She said. "I hope you know that this choice will affect the rest of your life."

"Don't I know it," Ranma said.

"Well, at least you're proving that you're _more _verile than Genma."

"Mom...didn't need the mental image."

"It's just a thought...besides, you know how I feel about you, Ranma."

"Yes, mom." Ranma said, as he went upstairs to get ready...the week just went by quickly.

"You know, you're lucky, in my day, Genma and I wouldn't had let you date all those women."

"I'm just greatful for that."

Ranma got ready...he decided to change up his wardrobe. For as much as he liked his Chinese fighting outfits, they were getting boring. However, he did have a pair of blue jeans that he got for his birtday...and never wore. He decided to do what was out of character for him, he got dressed and ready to go. He also got a pair of tennis shoes because there was going to be a lot of walking. Then at the appointed hour of 8:00 p.m. the bloned haired, and very good looking, Mai Valentine showed up. Though she has _one _flaw...she's sometimes a bit self absorbed. She ended up dressing a bit more conservatively than Kodachi. That is, she covered everything, including he cleavage.

"Hello, Ranma," Mai said as she brushed her long hair back. She entered the hollowed halls of the Tendo training hall. Though the structure was wooden, it was still sturdy.

"Hello, Mai," Ranma greeted in his new change of clothes.

"Well, I see you're doing different." Mai said.

"Yep." Ranma said, as he caught Genma out the corner of his eye. "You don't want to be launched all the way back to Odaiba again old man?" Ranma asked.

"No, Ranma," Genma said.

"Then back off, ok?" Ranma said.

"Alright," Genma said, pathetically like a dog with his tail between his legs.

"Ready, Mai?" Ranma then asked.

"I'm ready," Mai said, as she took his hand.

They made their way to a fast food joint, and they started to go on their date. Though once they got to the fast food place...Mai started to talk about herself...and didn't let poor Ranma get a word in edgewise. She was talking about her love for the game Duel Monsters, which Ranma didn't care for. She also was talking about her favoirte card the Cyber Harpie (or Harpie Lady if you want to get technical). 

"...and Joey Wheeler beat me with the help of that Yugi Moto, and I caused Rex Raptor to duel for me..." Mai droned as Ranma didn't care.

"Uh...Excuse me, Mai, but I have to go make a phone call," Ranma said as he excused himself from the table.

"Don't be long, Ranma, I still have to tell you about Battle City," Mai said.

"OK," Ranma answered as he went to the payphone and made a call to Kuno, of all people.

"Hello," Kuno answered, "Oh, it's you you retched fiend."

"No time for name calling," Ranma said. "This Mai Valentine is not exactly datable now."

"You have made your bed, now you must lie in it," Kuno said.

"Gee thanks...see if I come to your rescue for your bad dates ever again." Ranma said and hung up.

"What was all that about," Mai asked.

"It was nothing, had to make sure the clothes dryer wasn't on," Ranma said.

"Good Idea," Mai said. She then started to drone on and on about Battle City and how Marik took her mind from her.

'Damn, how do people put up with her?', Ranma asked himself mentally. Though, after they were done eating, they went to a game shop so Mai could bulk up her deck to make it more deadly. Ranma decided to see what the fuss was about this damn game. So he asked the clerk and the clerk explained the game to him. Ranma got it, but still didn't understand why people were so damned obsessed with the game.

"I'll take a deck," Ranma said giving in.

"That'd be 4,450 yen," the clerk of the small game shop said.

"Here's 5,000, keep the change," Ranma said handing over the 5,000 yen note.

"Thank you very much," The man said. "I'll throw in this card...Anti-Raigeki"

"How much?"

"On me," He said.

"Oh, you're learning to play the game, Ranma," Mai said.

"Yeah," Ranma said.

"Good...but too bad we don't have much time," Mai said.

So, they ended up leaving the game shop, and they walked back to the Tendo house...damn, Mai talks too much. She kept droning on and on about Battle City. She also was droning on an on about her personal life...most of which Saotome could had one without. Then once he got back, he kissed, her good night...and good riddance. As soon as he got in...hie was not to happy with Mai Valentine at all.

"What happened, son?" Nodoka asked.

"Mom, I sometimes wish I was born deaf," Ranma said.

"Damn, she had a mouth on her," She said. "I don't know why your father does these things."

"Well, I'm going to bed...and I _don't _want to hear about dating for the rest of the week," Ranma said.

"Good night," Nodoka said as she kissed Ranma on his forhead, "Sleep well."

"Thank you mom," Ranma said. "You're the best."

"Um-hum," She said softly and nodded.

Ranma went to bed. He definately needed a week away from women. Though, since Genma got him into this situation, he really couldn't afford to go and make himself happy. He went to bed and he started to think about what was going to happen after Akane's date. Ranma was thinking about this situation, and he knew that he'd die by Soun's hand if he rejected Akane. Oh, boy! This is one hell of a situation that was brewing. However, Ranma had a plan of his own...He'd choose based on how the dates went. He went to sleep knowing that next Friday, he'd have to date Akane, and the next Saturday, he'd have to make his choice.


	10. Akane

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Akane

by

triviatrap1982

(Alright class, I don't own Ranma 1/2, Yu-Gi-Oh, or Inuyasha...now quit throwing those spitballs!)

Nine weeks had quickly came and went! Ranma was now nearing his final date...with his greatest rival, Akane Tendo. It wasn't that he didn't like her...it's just she unfairly tagged him as a lecher and a pervert in the same day. However, Ranma's gotten over that, and he's ready for his date. Well, Though it was the Friday, Happosai wasn't done feeling up women...even those who were afflicted by the Jusenkyo curse.

"GET HIM!" every female said, even Yugi, and Kaiba who had a board with a nail in it.

"HEHEHE, WHAT A HAUL WHAT A HAUL!" Happosai said as he got away again.

"Fucker," Kaiba said as everybody dispersed.

"Let's go find some hot water...and we'll take care of him," Yugi said.

"Not a bad Idea," Kaiba said and they went home to turn back to boys.

Meanwhile, Ranma was getting ready for his date, because they shut down Furinkan High because of all of the Kunos. Ranma was in the bath thinking abut his potentially life altering choice. There were a couple of dates that went well, Ukyo and Serenity. However the Majority _didn't _work out. Tea, with her incessant friendship speeches, Sango and Kirara (and Ranma actually felt sorry for the cat), Kodachi, yuck he wouldn't touch her with a 33 1/2 foot pole. Kagome, she's sweet, but she tends to bite people's heads off...and Mai Valentine...Ranma didn't need to know all of her business at all. Finally, Shampoo, who got pissed when not only Cologne found out what she wanted to do, but tipped off both Ranma and Mousse. Ranma sat in the tub for a little bit when Ryoga and Mousse came in and got in...and they were in their human forms.

"Gee, Mousse, I'd thought you'd die by Cologne's hands," Ranma said.

"Well, she didn't dock me pay...and I'm going after that Mai Valentine," Mousse said as he leaned back.

"Gee you're stupid," Ryoga said. "Ranma just went out with her, and she droned on and on about herself."

"Well, she's is beautiful, even more beautiful than Shampoo," Mousse said.

"Mousse, you're just saying that because _I might _not choose either of them," Ranma said.

"You're right, I'd take both of them to town and rock their worlds," Mousse said with a triumphant smile on his face.

"Mousse, you're as dumb as a box of rocks," Ryoga and Ranma both said.

"Also, blind as a bat," Ranma added.

"Yep," Ryoga said. "The only time he can tell Shampoo from Ukyo is if he's a duck."

"Guys, I get the point!" Mousse snapped...as Nabiki was about to enter the bathroom.

"OCCUPIED!" The three boys said.

"Oh, sorry, I'll talk to you three when you're done." Nabiki said through the door.

"Mousse, did you forget to put the 'Knock First' sign up?"

"Yeah," Mouse said sheepishly.

"Mousse, You should get contacts...you'd look better." Ryoga said.

"I should, eh?" Mousse said. "I'll think about it."

When the boys dried off and got dressed, they went to go and see Nabiki. Mousse had to hold Ryoga's so he wouldn't get lost. Once they were there, Nabiki summoned them into her room, and she wanted to talk to the three of them. First Ranma, she knew that he _might _be her brother-in-law eventually. So she did have one thing to ask him,

"Ranma...since I've helped you out, it wouldn't be fair if you had all the fun." Nabiki said.

"I'll rope them into a date with you, Nabiki," Ranma said.

"They better have plently of cash," Ryoga said under his breath.

"Well, Ryoga, I'll let that remark slide," Nabiki said. "You'll be unlucky number one."

'Looks like I'll have to borrow from Kodachi..._which _I don't want to do,' Ryoga thought to himself.

"Hey, Nabiki, Let me date you first!" Mousse whined. "Besides, I didn't have to do _that _with Kodachi to get the cash,"

"Alright, Ryoga, you're off the hook...but you're right, Mousse you'd better have a lot of cash."

Mousse smiled, as _finally _he had a girl that he can put his moves on. Shampoo would had just turned him into a duck and well, tormented him. Meanwhile, Ranma had left Nabiki to her own devices and went to his room to get dressed. Once he was dressed, Akane came by.

"Are you ready yet?" Akane asked.

"Give me a moment please?" Ranma said...trying _hard _not to call her an uncute tomboy, or anything similar. Later on, Ranma was dressed in his usual clothing, a silk Chinese fighting shirt, and a pair of pants that is tied up at the ankles. Akane wore her green floral dress, with her. But as soon as they walked out of the door...the sky got dark and it started to rain.

"Damn it!" Akane snapped.

"Hey, think of it like this, we can be indoors on our date," Ranma said.

"Yep," Akane said as Ranma got two umbrellas. "Here, you'll need this."

"Thanks," Akane said.

"Let's go," Ranma said.

Akane and Ranma both went to the matinee at the theater. It was cheaper, and they had enough money to get popcorn and potato chips. Though, Akane was feeling like she wanted to be adventerous with her drink...so she threatened the snack bar clerk to mix up Pepsi, Mountain Dew, orange soda, and root beer. Ranma gave her a look, but he just got a straight up Pepsi.

"Well, Akane, feeling bold today aren't we?" Ranma said.

"Who asked you!" Akane snapped.

'Keep comments to yourself, Ranma', He mentally told himself.

Once they entered the 100 seat room, with the very large screen with THX, Dolby sourround sound, and DTS...this action flick was going to be killer. Though, there was one problem, Akane hated these kinds of movies, untill she saw that the hero was a woman, who acted exactly like her. That is, sweet, but a very violent maniac. During the packed movie, Akane had her hand on Ranma's leg.

'What the hell am I supposed to do!' Ranma mentally snapped, as he didn't know what to do...if he let her do it, he'd be tagged a perv...if he didn't he'd be tagged an idiot.

"Ranma, what's wrong?" Akane asked.

"I'm just a bit nervous," Ranma admitted

"Don't be," Akane said. "It'll all be over, very quickly."

'That's what I'm afraid of,' Ranma thought to himself.

"You know, Akane, this is Kikyo's first movie," Ranma said.

"Really?" Akane said. "You definately know her very well."

"She is my favorite singer," Ranma said. He had a fanboy/fangirl crush on Kikyo.

"Well, her boyfriend, Inuyasha, has just cut a deal with her record company." Akane said.

"I know," Ranma said. "I've heard him sing and he's pretty good."

"Excuse me you two," an usher said. "Are you two enjoying the fim?"

"Yes we are," Ranma said. "Are we being too noisy?"

"No, you're one of the quieter ones in this neighborhood," He said as he went to his work.

"That went over quickly," Ranma said.

"Yeah," Akane said.

"Akane, I do have a question for you...in the two years that we've known each other, we never taken the time to find out about each other," Ranma said.

"You're right, we hadn't," Akane admitted.

"Wanna ditch this movie and go somewhere...more private and quiet?"

"Yes, please."

Ranma got out of his seat first, and he helped Akane up. They both took their things, including their umbrellas, and left the theater. Then, they ended up walking to the shopping district and going to a cafe where they could just sit and talk. It turns out, that Ranma was growing to love Akane. Though he felt for her, when she told of how her mother died. Then, he did get an idea, that could help her, even if he didn't choose her.

"Hey, Akane, why don't you practice cooking using cookbooks," Ranma suggested.

"How will that help me be a better cook?" Akane asked.

"You'll have to follow the instructions to the letter," Ranma said.

"Will you help?"

"Yeah, I had to learn how to cook the basic foods myself...beats the old man trying to cook and force it down my throat."

"Well, I suppose I can practice cooking now," Akane said. "Hell, I mess up microwavable meals."

"Man, Akane, don't be down on yourself," Ranma said. "Besides, everybody's still learning till they day they die."

This statement, had Akane thinking, it was never too late to patch things up. So, she decided to re-introduce herself to Ranma, which, went well. Ranma ended up re-introducing himself to Akane. This time, he was in his boy form, and fully clothed. Then, on the loudspeaker, an American oldie came on. This was C.W. McCall's _Convoy. _ Neither Ranma, nor Akane were able to get what the song was about. After they had their lunch, of chicken, squid, and rice...they went to the Mall, to see what they can buy. Though, Ranma saw Marik, and decided to have some fun with him.

"Akane, feel like being devilish?" Ranma asked.

"Yeah...are you sure, I mean he's not the one to mess with."

"Oh, yeah," Came a voice...it was Ishizu, Ranma and Akane's teacher.

"Miss Ishtar, I didn't know you'd be here," Ranma and Akane said.

"It's Ishuzu, when we're not on school grounds," Ishizu said.

"How'd you know we'd do something to Marik?" Akane asked.

"He needs to have a prank pulled on him...he's the one that nobody stand." Ishizu said.

"Well...I suppose I can mess with him as badly as I normally would Ryoga." Ranma said.

"Hey, Ranma do this..." Akane said as she whispered her plan in his ear.

Since Ranma is _half _girl, he can pose and be a completely different person. Ishizu had some clothes he can borrow, but Ranma had the fake glasses (which were just plain glass), and he did something he hadn't done since the dragon's whisker incident...he has undone his pigtail and went to splash himself with cold water to turn into the red-haired beauty that Kuno _still _has wet dreams about. Ranma came out, in the Furninkan Girls uniform...why Ishizu had it was beyond her comprehension. Ranma then went up to Marik and decided to have some fun.

"Hello," Ranma-chan said. "Oh, Mai would like to thank you for sending her to the shadow realm,"

"Uh...well...duh..." Marik said...and his dark half didn't even catch on.

"Let me thank you with a big, smooch on the lips," Ran-chan said, seductively.

"Well, er...um..." Marik still struggled to get out...then, that's when Ranma quickly took the glasses off, and popped up.

"Nevermind!" Ranma said.

"RANMA YOU JERK!" Marik said as he started to pound Ranma...hard.

"AHH, CAN'T YOU TAKE A JOKE!" Ran-chan cried.

"DOES IT LOOK LIKE I'M LAUGHING!" Marik said as he put the hurting on poor Ranma.

"Ishizu was this _your _doing!" Marik snapped.

"Yes, and there's not a damned thing you can do about it," Ishizu said.

"Damn it all," Marik said as Akane collected Ranma and took him home. She figured that his safety wasn't to be fooled around with.

Once they got home, Akane applied the first aid to Ranma. Once she came too, she was pissed, though she had a smile on her face. Though, Akane wasn't smiling, she appreciated what Ranma has done. Then, out of Akane's mouth, were words that Ranma'd never thought would pass.

"Ranma," Akane said. "Despite you're getting beat down...I had a good time today."

"You know, I did too," Ranma said.

"Well, You just can't go to sleep for awhile." Akane said.

"Yeah, he got me good...just the same treatment I got from Ryoga the last time I've pulled this stunt."

"Oh...I see," Akane said...and got Ranma scared. "At least now, you've learned from your mistakes,"

"Whew!" Ranma sighed as Akane left her to her own pain. Though, Ranma-chan did drag herself to the baths, and turn back to a boy.

"Well," Ranma said to himself. "If I didn't know any better, I think Akane actually likes me."

Then, at that moment, Ranma ended up getting out of the tub, and dried off. He got dressed and went in the dojo to see Akane working out. He winced in pain when he saw how deadly accurate she was when it came to hitting the training dummy. That is...if this date hadn't have gone well, that woud had been his head rolling on the dojo floor. Though, now he _really _had a tough choice on who to pick, and an easy choice of who to reject. Who would he pick...Serenity, who's cute, mentally balanced, _and _knows where her head is at...Akane, since he did date her, and is still her fiancee...or Ukyo, an old childhood friend...even when it didn't seem so in the beginning. Ranma sighed as he went back to the house and started to think about his decision.


	11. Imperfect Ending, Perfcet Choice

The Many Loves and Rivals of Ranma Saotome: Imperfect Ending, Perfect Choice

by

triviatrap1982

(Yay! I don't own Ranma 1/2, Yu-gi-oh, or Inuyasha! Who'd want all that pressure anyway?)

The next day, when Ranma had but a few hours sleep, came the descision. He had went on a date with nine women, within a nine week period. Now he'd have to make his choice, on which woman to choose. However, he decided to break the engagements for the dates that _didn't _go well. Everybody came to see this decision at the Tendo hall. In fact, on this starry night, it would be one that nobody in Furinkan would ever forget. Since this was going to be an essentally, life altering experience, Ranma reflected on all of his dates, with Ryoga, Mousse, Kuno, and Yugi.

"Well, here it is gentlemen," Ranma said

"Well, Saotome, let's filter through those who are automatically out," Kuno said. "...and Kodachi is one of them."

"Yeah, you're telling us," the other three chimed in.

"At least she just put you to sleep," Yugi said. "Me and Ranma are scarred for life by seeing her nude...in the tub."

"That's just wrong," Kuno said. "People think _I'm _this city's greatest pervert."

"Next is Tea," Mousse said. "She hit me with a friendship sermon yesterday."

"Don't remind me," Yugi said. "If she says another friendship speech, I'll slap her silly."

"You would hit a woman?" Mousse asked.

"I'm tempted," Yugi said, and he switched to his dark half Yami. "Besides, your Shampoo was no better either,"

"Yeah, her tainted pork rolls," Ryoga said, "that she tried to use to make Ranma choose her."

"Well, there's also Mai Valentine," Kuno said. "She talks to damn much abuot herself."

"No shit, Kuno," Ranma said.

"Then there's Kagome," Yami said. "She'll take your damned head off."

"I'm sure she doesn't mean it," Kuno said.

"That's because you didn't have to date her," Yami countered.

"You dare take the name of..." Kuno started when Ryoga shot him a look.

"Before this gets any worse, we have one more to cut out," Ranma said

"That one's easy, that's Sango," Ryoga said. "You just don't like cats, and her Kirara would give you hell everyday."

"Bingo!" Ranma said.

"Now, for the three you get to choose from," Mousse said.

"Yep, Ukyo, Serenity, and Akane," Ranma responded.

"Tough choice," Kuno said.

"Well, we did make the easier choice," Mousse said.

"Let's tell them?" Yami asked.

"Sure," Ryoga said as they went downstairs to meet with the nine fiancee.

The Ryoga had a system, a tap on the shoulder for the six fiancees who didn't make it would have to leave, and break the engagement. That is, to say, the six who's dates didn't go over so well, had to go. Sango was a good sport about it, and wished Ranma luck. Kagome and Mai were re-thinking their strategies for dating him. Shampoo was pissed and furious, though Mousse took the brunt of her anger. Kodachi promised death to the new fiancee, however, she was knocked out by Shampoo in front of everybody. Tea was crushed, pissed, upset and mad. Though she had it coming to her. Now it was just Ukyo, Serenity, and Ranma. Ranma had a straight forward questin that the three needed to think about.

"Listen...if I were to marry you, would you care about my happiness?" Ranma asked.

"Wow, that's a good one," Serenity said.

"Damn, he laid it on thick," Ukyo and Akane said.

"Well, Serenity, this is something to think about, don't rush into it if you ain't ready for it," Joey said.

"Well...to be honest, I'm not ready for this kind of thing," Serenity said. "Sorry, Ranma."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Akane said.

"Besides, Serenity, you've already got me as your friend," Ranma said.

Serenity nodded as Ranma, then, looked to Ukyo and Akane. Needless to say, that they were guilty of not caring for Ranma's happiness. Akane moreso, but she did make the effort to care, and it is starting to pay off. Ukyo on the other hand, she's still having those fantasies of using girl-type Ranma to do her chores at her restraunt. However, Akane had something genuine for Ranma. When he told of his practical joke to Ryoga during the girl's locker room assult incident, she took it very well. Now, comes the hard part.

"Ukyo," Ranma started, "are you still seeing me as your chore boy?"

"Yes...I mean no...I mean...fuck it!" Ukyo stumbled.

"You are aren't you...be honest with me," Ranma said.

"Fine, I still do...sorry," Ukyo said.

"Ukyo, you have to learn that people helping out is good, and all, but making them do what you're supposed to do, is downright slavery." Ranma stated.

"Well, I have a lot to learn then," Ukyo said realizing now that she was beaten. "We're still friends right?"

"Sure," Ranma said. "Akane and me'll come to your restraunt whenever we can."

"Right," Akane said. "Besides, Ukyo, you're a working girl, and you need all the cash you can get."

"Thank you!" Ukyo said.

"That leaves you Akane," Ranma said.

"Ranma...sorry about all those times I've lost my cool," Akane said.

"I'm sorry for all those times I was cruel to you," Ranma said.

"Wow, didn't see that one coming," Ukyo said.

"It's...so..beautiful!" Joey said, with tears streaming down his face.

"Yes it is," Soun said as he and Joey took each other in a hug and, they both cried their eyes out.

Later on, the announcement was made, and a lot of the Akane lovers were dissapointed. Even more of the anti-Akane crew were furious and pissed. However, there was nothing these people could do. Then, when word hit the street, all of the rejected fiancees had mixed emotions. Mai, Tea, and Sango decided to make it right by helping Akane out. Shampoo, Kodachi, and Kagome decided that they needed to crash the wedding...if it happened. Now, it was on...one year from now, the marriage was going to take place...how would it end?


End file.
